Glory to God

Wake County has been dealing with a lot of deaths recently. In the past 2-3 weeks there has been about 15-20 deaths due to car accidents in the county. 15-20?? That's insane! I mean, I know people die every day, but still. That many in just one county from the same cause? That's crazy to me.

One of those deaths was a man from my church named Flip Kissinger. A bus rammed into the front of his truck and into his wind shield. He lived for about another week or two. I honestly have no idea how he even lived for another week. He had like 47 bones or so broken. It's crazy. His funeral had many many attendants. Many people are greiving right now over this.

Another death which has recently happened is the death of Ben McNeal. Ben also went to my church. He and Flip both died within the same week. Ben was diagnosed with the ALS disease (which is a disease which causes the muscles in your body to break down and basically die.) He was diagnosed this past August and died December 9th. He left such a huge impact on so many lives inside and outside of my church. Ben knew he was dying. His death wasn't sudden at all, yet he didn't complain once. Instead, he went and told everyone about Christ. He told people the reason he wasn't worried about dying was because he had faith in the only God who concurs death. He was so excited about going and being with his Father, and now he is there.

Tonight, i was on the facebook chat and i was talking to one of the 7th grade girls in my middle school small group from church. She was telling me how Flip's death has been hard on her family because they were very close friends with him. She said Mr. Kissinger was like a dad to her, so it was like losing a dad in a way. Though she's hurting right now, I just want everyone to know how proud i am of her. As she was telling me all this, she said something along the lines of, "it's sad because he was so close to my family, but knowing he's in heaven with God helps alot. prayer has helped me alot through all this." A 7th grader told me this. She was saying many other things like, "I just need to lean on God." "I just need to trust Him with this." "I'll be okay as long as i keep praying."

When she was telling me all this, i honestly was blown away! Not very many adults even comprehend the importance of relying on God with their situations, especially when it's death! I told her that it's sooo cool to see her saying all this as she's so young. Like i've said on previous blogs, dealing with that stuff isn't easy at all if you don't lean on the only One who can truly comfort you. God's the only one who holds that peace you need to see past a death or any other situation. Honestly, when a follower of the Lord dies, it's not really necessary to call it a funeral, it's a celebration! They're done with this awful, sinful world and are with our God forever in eternity. It's awesome. And it's even more awesome that a 7th grader can grasp this concept completely!

Goodness, God is good. But do please keep in prayers the families and friends of those who have lost a love one just recently. Those who don't know Christ won't be able to see the good out of this as clear as Christians can. Pray the Lord will use this to bring them to Himself. Glory to God forever.

Patience. Continuing to be a never-ending battle.

Okay, so the next 6 paragraphs i actually wrote October 27 and never published it. i was going through my saved drafts, read it, and it convicted me alot. So here is what i wrote a little over a month ago, and below that is what i wrote today::::

Something I've been thinking alot about lately: patience, and the fact that i don't have any at all.
I've known for a long time that i don't have any patience. I'm not very good at waiting for people, taking my time, thinking before i act/speak, or being cautious of those around me. Seeing all of these flaws in myself caused me to wonder why i had such a hard time with things as simple as these. Then i discovered this--> patience truly has become my never ending battle and i'm not fully relying on God and His Word.

Patience is not something anyone can have on their own. It's not something that i can decide to have one day, then not have it at all the next. It deals with the heart. It deals with my heart.

I can recall several different situations which caused me to tell someone, "Okay, I'm not a patient person, so don't test me!" Most of the time it was in a joking manner. But a majority of it probably wasn't. Recognizing this makes me wonder, was I ever truly trusting God with all my situations? Apparently I wasn't. And this saddens me quite a bit.

God, being God, is perfect. He is patient. He is so patient that He knows how many times we (i) will fall away from Him, yet he loves us and keeps calling us to Him. There are so many examples in the Bible where a strong man or woman of God would fall away from Him, but it's obvious that the Lord stays by their side and returns to them as soon as they cry out to Him. Honestly, if i was God (which thankfully i'm not) i would have not waited around time and time again and moved on to a new set of people. If only i had that kind of patience, oh i'd be a totally different person.

So, to work on my patience, I've asked the Lord to a.) help me with it because i can't do this without Him. and b.) test me with it. i will honestly never leave this state of impatience until i am tested. and God, being able to answer all prayer, has been helping me so much! It's like, so many things which caused me to snap or get mad about a month ago, don't even faze me. Now, God's been testing me at least once a day or so. but i've learned to lean on him. i still have alot of work to do. i still get impatient when i drive behind a dumb car who goes 10 miles under the speed limit, i still get ticked off at myself if i forget something and have to drive almost the whole way back just to get it. But at the same time, i'm learning from all of this.

For me, it's so awesome to see how God is working with me through this. Like i can feel Him practically standing or sitting by me when i feel myself getting heated up inside with impatience. Then it's like He places his hand on mine and all the heat is calm and cool. it's just such an awesome feeling. Goodness, my Lord blows me away.
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It's crazy for me to see that i wrote that so long ago, yet the Lord is still testing me with this day in, and day out. The past few days have been so stressful! I've been working on projects at literally the last minute, I've been trying to figure out what God wants of me in a certain situation, and I've been trying to tune down my hopes for something else that may actually never happen. Now that i think about it, I haven't been giving my patience to the Lord at all. I've been telling myself, the Lord, and those around me that all i want to do is what the Lord wants me to do. And that is 100% true. Now, I just have to follow through with what i'm telling everyone.

I can easily say that i trust the Lord and what He's doing, but i have to act upon that as well.